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This could well turn out to be the shortest match report I’ve ever done… I didn’t scavenge much ammunition from Friday evening, the Almonds scattering themselves far and wide so that we never had a full compliment in place all evening, with order of play turned topsy turvy to boot, and it made for a bit of a subdued atmosphere – or maybe that was just me! Half the team wanted to hit and run, including our esteemed Craptain, so Compact took over the reins from 3rd up when he returned from his secret rendezvous. I was getting a bit nervous about being put on to play after peRV & Craptain had held us all square on the game with their starters of 24 & 17, Turk & Sparky put us in the lead by 4 having scored 21 a-piece and Lodge & Orical increased this to 9 by scoring 14 & 24 – Orical following the traditional Almond pattern of scoring a 9 followed closely by a duck – because I didn’t want to be responsible, particularly under Compact’s rule, for losing our lead. However, it turned out to be just a coincidence that we’d taken the lead under different management, as after VC’s decision to play Jocky & aRCe 4th pair we soon found ourselves 22 pins down following Jocky’s neat dozen and aRCe’s oh-so-close Slimbridge, redeeming himself with 1 pin on his last up! I swear that there is a conspiracy that I always get played against a high-scoring opponent… playing 5th pair with Compact as my co-pilot, I rallied after a ducking poor start to finish on 21, but my West Sport oppo clocked up their top score with 29!! Compact put a dozen on the board, and this saw any recovery disappear into the mist as we dropped a further unlucky 13. I shall wish I’d tried a bit harder if I don’t manage to leap ahead of Compact in the averages… I chose to throw my last ball wide of its mark to avoid beating Orical & inflaming an already volcanic skittling situation with him! We were now left trailing by 35 as Hammer & Chuckle 1 took up the ‘anker challenge.
Hammer, unusually quiet for most of the evening – allegedly because of my potentially inflammatory remark about him trying to send me filth via the internet (it was after all only a harmless Name Game… delighting some with its fanciful descriptions & ****ing others off in equal measure with its inaccuracies), showing that even the most insensitive, chauvinistic, mouthy, opinionated, misogynistic, monk look-alikes do have some feeling – had the best game of the evening, just missing out on a 30 but taking top score with his steadily accumulated 29. Chuckle 1 took away 2nd highest score, which is good for nothing except maybe rubbing Craptain’s nose in next week. Their heroic efforts nearly stole back the win from West Sports, but we were 10 pins short of that feat. A good effort though boys! Our next match is another FRIDAY AWAY game: 16/2 against Stokers at Little Stoke Social Club. peRV has already advised his apologies – he’s off to learn to ride a bike somewhere foreign & won’t be with us for a few weeks – but I don’t think the rest of the team was canvassed for availability… although I seem to recall a lot of moaning when it was mentioned it was another Friday next week!!
I am almost ashamed of this week’s offering: I can only hope normal stinging service is restored next week – dependent on the course of events leading up to and following Valentines…
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