What a stunning game we had against the PROINNs on Tuesday! Greatly encouraged by their awe at the length of our alley we started out on a positive note: shame then that they managed to master our alley in a way we still struggle with, and that their Captain chose to rub our noses in it by imparting the information that they don’t usually win! Nice to know when you’ve just been well and truly massacred - she was probably retaliating to Compact’s unexpected response to her remark about never having been on such a long one...
It would appear that most of The Almonds have already settled for relegation back to Division 3. This could be construed as rather a negative outlook, but far from it: the team are just looking to the future and winning that prize money for the 2006/7 season when we get promoted again! There was wild talk about our Craptain being stripped of his status having burnt himself out trying to instil some oomph into our game, but it would appear that by the time all the alternatives had been considered and discarded for one reason or another – and obviously in depth, pertinent reasons, none of your convoluted rubbish: you had to be willing to a) wear a pink shirt and b) fit into Reg's! – there was only Reg left!! I didn’t hear the particular reasons behind my own exclusion, in fact I am pretty sure I wasn’t even a serious consideration, I’m probably just too young for such responsibility.
Lodge, who had to endure yet more taunts of ‘bovvered’, excelled & redeemed himself after last week by scoring 33 & deservedly earning himself top score as well as having the additional virtue of being the only Almond not to get a duck. Funny how our 2 highest scores came from the Young Guns... Jake had a good game to finish on 25. aRCe & Wiggle just scraped into the 20s, otherwise it was a week of mediocre scoring that I can’t bring myself to write about in detail. I do have to defend Orical’s 5.
As you are all aware, he has been through a really bad experience over the past few months and it is very difficult for him to adjust to being back out in the ‘real’ world. His hands have become used to the weight and size of the TV remote, and the spherical wooden feel to the balls is very disconcerting, as is the action involved in throwing them down the alley – it is completely alien for him to have to let go you see. He has also become much more accustomed to exercising his hands and wrists utilising a completely different action following his post-operative exercises. I am sure you will all be very understanding and sympathetic until he finds his form once more, and I am sure that he will get used to wearing his Have Sex & Travel shirt in time too.
I wasn’t really sure how to address the chicken issue that Jocky has – even Taffy didn’t hesitate in disowning him immediately! – so I am going to leave that subject well alone... although I thought Sparky’s impersonation was spookily authentic.
So, for those of you in any doubt about the result of the game, we lost by 74 pins. We are at home again next Tuesday against SEGA, and we will all be looking forward to Our 4 returning triumphant from The 4s, which takes place the same evening at 7pm at Patchway Sports & Social Club. Good luck to Craptain, aRCe, Compact & Chuckle 1.
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